the Lazy-Ass bastard thread

[MountieXXL]

Thats right, if you feel you do or did something exceptionally lazy, slob-ish or decadent and feel the whole world (at least the important parts of the whole world) should know about it then go ahead and post.

I'll start:
I drink my beer at room temperature because that way I don't have to get up from in front of my PC and walk to the fridge. (or even open a fridge door in that case)

[Toco]

ok then where to start, i dont accualy do any real work at work i just show up and get high and collect a paycheck. i have a mini fridge upstairs but im too lazy to bring it down to my room so i drink warm everything, ive accualy paid for a hooker casue im too lazy to go to the bar and go thru the whole pickup/dating process, in school i was known as the laziest kid in school (i shit u not) i have a wireless setup for my pc for the sole purpose of being able to play from bed when im too lazy to get up and move to the chair which is maybe 3 steps away, if the phone is ringing and i dont have a working cordless i just wont answer it. the paint on the wall is pealing from me leaning against it while playin games from bed (no head board) and finaly the best for last ive accualy told a previous girlfriend i was too lazy to have sex. im sure there are some more lazy things i do i just cant think of em all, needless to say im proud of bein lazy, ive turned it into an art damn near lol

[LazyEagle]

Finally, a thread devoted to my personal lifestyle choice!

Seriously though, where does one start when asked to catalogue a lifetime of similar behaviour.

I guess the best place to start is back in my college days when I pretty much spent 2 weeks in bed, because I had a crappy black and white tv in there(Home and Away being my alarm clock around 12.30 to 1pm) and a few good books(and lots of smoke).
I was lucky that my flatmates at the time were very supportive of my decision and were extremely helpful. Acctually, without their aid, I never would have been able to do it.

Flashforward to present day, and I don't really want to mention work, because well I'm writing this from my desk, but I can't turn up high or anything, but I can turn up with a disgraceful attitude and a tendency to believ that if I bitch about something long enough, I generally will not be expected to do it. Oh, and did I mention that I manage a team of 4 people? Ding Ding Ding! Delegation is such a wonderful word! Oh, and somehow I managed to blag myself a work laptop, so I often wake up the morning and decide I can't be arsed going to work, sorry, I mean that I have some pressing isssue that requires me to stay at home and instead work from my laptop, which sits side by side with my main PC.

And if you don't think that is particularly lazy, you should see me play the Wii. I'm pretty much the least active player EVER, and I'm sure that if the folks in Nintendo saw me playing tennis, they be very annoyed that "I just don't get it". Well I'm sorry Nintendo, as fun as your new gaming system is, I'm usually far too tired/ can't be bothered enough to throw myself around the place!

[MountieXXL]

yea well I also don't own any type of clothing that is white or light gray because I like being able to throw everything into the same washing machine without consequences.. I have a work laptop too, so when I can get away with it then "home-office" ftw! Now that might not sound terribly lazy, but consider the fact that when I got this job I moved so that work is 5min walking distance from home! not just that, on days I have off I actually do go to work for the lunch break because its the cheapest way of getting a nice warm meal, even cheaper than if I'd cook it myself.

[LazyEagle]

on days I have off I actually do go to work for the lunch break because its the cheapest way of getting a nice warm meal, even cheaper than if I'd cook it myself.

I'm impressed Mountie!

Although, I have to say that the one aspect of my life where laziness doesn't come into it is in relation to food!

[FullMetal_old]

im to lazy to say what im doing

[Jonnywhy]

Well I...*Falls asleep*

[Supernova]

I shall keep this short and just name one thing. I have a pool cue in my room which i have shortened to just the right length to be able to turn on and off the light switch, turn on and off the tv, take the window off the latch and close the curtains, all from prodding distance of my computer/bed.

Why shortened? because not only do i need to put any effort moving forwards to any of the above items, I also don't have to move *back*, as some are a little closer to me than cue + arm length

[MountieXXL]

I have a back-scratcher, and sometimes when my right hand is on the mouse and my nose itches when I'm scratching my back, I use it to scratch my nose.

[cockijoe]

Thank fuk i dont employ you lot, your arse would be well and truly booted.
Bunch of lazy bastids no wonder the worlds fuked