UNLIMITED WORD STORY THREAD

[dintbo(aka bosco)]

As some of you will know I started telling what I considered interesting stories in another thread for reasons that are now defunct. However some people seemed to enjoy them so I figured, why not set up a thread for them. Anyone with an interesting, funny, informative etc story to tell, post it here. To get things going I'm gonna throw the eight stories I've alraedy told into the next eight posts, so if you've already read them, get scrolling! Now that's what I call spamming with style

[dintbo(aka bosco)]

In a different post recently Del mentioned the band Lemon Jelly. I heard recently that on their most recent tour they had so much equipment if was impossible to have a support band in venue with smallish stages, so they decided to do 'Lemon Jelly Bingo' instead. Each member of the audience was given a bingo card on the way in but instead of money, winners received Lemon Jelly related prizes such as T-shirts, signed albums etc. What a class idea

[dintbo(aka bosco)]

As we have a lot of Irish and British people on the server some of you might find this interesting. I was watching a documentary a few years ago called 'Mongrel Nation' about how there are many 'British' things that are heavily influenced by other nations. When it came to the Irish influence the biggest thing was language. As well as the many famous and important Irish poets and novelists (Oscar Wilde, James Joyce etc) certain commonly used words/phrases in the English language actually come from Irish. For example the word 'smashing' is often used to describe something good ie. 'Thanks for dinner, it was absolutely smashing' This comes from the Irish phrase 'Is Máith Sin' (Pronounced 'Iss maw shin) which means 'That is good'

[dintbo(aka bosco)]

There is, to the best of my knowledge, only one person in history who has accidentally killed himself by conducting an orchestra. His name was Jean Baptiste Lully and here is how it happened.

Todays method of conducting an orchestra, person stands in front of orchestra and counts time, influences tempo, dynamics, mood etc, only became the standard during the romantic period of music (1800-1900) as it was during this time that the large symphony orchestras began to appear. Before this there were many different ways to conduct. Lully was both a relatively well known composer and conductor of a small string and woodwind orchestra. His way of conducting the orchestra was by banging a large staff on the floor. During on performance he accidentally stabbed himself in the foot causing a rather large wound. Some days later he contracted gangrene and died.

[dintbo(aka bosco)]

There was a young man named Pythagoras (yes the one with the theorem) who main interests were maths and music. While walking past a blacksmiths one day he heard 2 blacksmiths working together, and the sound of both anvils being hit at the same time were very pleasing to the ear, so he went to investigate. He discovered that the anvils were different sizes, one being exactly half the size of the other. Pleased with his discovery he went on his way. Later his rather active mind started thinking, and he realised he could apply the same principle to stringed instruments, using longer strings for lower notes.

It was roughly 2000 years later that famous astronomer Galileo discovered that the thickness of a string also effected its pitch; the thicker the string the lower the note. Up until this point strings used in instruments had always been the same thickness, and had just varied in length. If Galileo had not discovered this, a string of no less than 12 metres in length would have been required to produce the lowest note on a grand piano, making it 8 times longer than the instrument we know today.

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[dintbo(aka bosco)]

The city where I'm from, Waterford, is famous for 2 things; crystal and blaas. Most, if not all, of you will have heard of Waterford Crystal so there's no real need to bother with that. However, only people who have lived in or near Waterford will have heard of the blaa. So allow me to explain.

The blaa is a soft floury bread roll close to what some of you will know as the bap. However there are many differences. The blaa actually originated in France and was brought to Waterford by the Hugonoughts, a group of French people exiled from their country for some reason or another (probably religion). This roll was covered in flour and therefore looked very white, hence its name; Blaa actually comes from the French word 'blanc' which, of course, means white. Waterford city council provided homes for the Hugonoughts and in return they provided Waterford bakers with the secret of how to make the perfect blaa. Waterford definitely got the better end of that deal

[dintbo(aka bosco)]

I was watching an episode of The West Wing a few years back and during the episode the question was asked 'What is the only fruit who's seed grow on the outside'. The answer was ............the strawberry. I was quite delighted with this little bit of trivia, and asked many people the same question thinking I was rather clever. Until i asked a particular friend of mine, who's response was, you're wrong!!!!! How could I be wrong I asked myself, I heard it on The West Wing for fucks sake. But I was wrong, and here's why:

Fruit is, by definition, the ripened ovary of the plant, it is the flesh that protects the seeds. Therefore strawberries are not actually fruits at all They are the receptacle of the plant, but as strawberries are the only receptacles we eat, they are bundled in with fruits. This intrigued me even more, so I delved a little further. Many foods we would consider vegetables, are actually fruits. Most of us will know that tomatoes are fruits, but did you know that peppers were as well. Then we come to the humble banana. There's no seeds in there I hear some of you say. Well there is. However commercially grown bananas are sterile, therefore the seeds are tiny. However for some reason, which I cannot remember, bananas can also be classed as herbs.

Apologies if this story seems a little unusual, but I'm very hungover.

[dintbo(aka bosco)]

Rossini, a very famous operatic composer (The Barber Of Seville, William Tell etc), is known to be one of the laziest people in musical history. Several time during his career he 'compiled' operas using music he had already composed for other purposes. However his laziness is best demonstrated by the following situation:

As a lazy, and not too poor, fucker, Rossini had a number of servants to keep his home clean and his body fed. There was one servant who's sole purpose was to get him out of bed in order to change his bed clothes. The only way she could get him out of bed was to play one of his famous melodies on the piano in his room, leaving out the last note. The unfinished melody would drive him mad to the point where he had to get out of bed to finish it at which point the bed clothes would be changed! Legend

[dintbo(aka bosco)]

St. Patrick is probably one of the most internationally recognised patron saints, but for those who do not know he is indeed the patron saint of Ireland. His feast day, March 17th, is celebrated around the world by parades passing through the main streets of hundreds of villages, towns and cities. St. Patrick was originally from Wales, but spent most of his life traveling Ireland spreading the teachings of the Roman Catholic Church, converting the masses from paganism, which was prevalent in Ireland at the time (4th-5th century ish). He used the shamrock, a three leaf clover, to explain the mystery of the holy trinity; the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Bunches of shamrock are still worn by people on his feast day.

The real legend of St. Patrick, however, is that he banished all the snakes from Ireland. It has since been proven that post-glacial Ireland had no snakes to begin with, so where did this come from? Some believe it comes from St. Patrick's conversion of pagans, as the Druids used a serpent as their symbol. Others believe fanatics of the saint spread the story on order to help him gain popularity. Either way, it was recognised a long time ago that Patrick, even though he dedicated his whole life to the church, he did not perform any 'miracles', a necessity in the eyes of the church, to becoming a saint. Therefore our very own St. Patrick is not actually a saint. It is reported that he was buried in Downpatrick , Co. Down which is in Northern Ireland, though nobody knows. this for sure. His jawbone, however, had been sold to thousands upon thousands of gullible Americans over the years.

[cockijoe]

The real legend of St. Patrick, however, is that he banished all the snakes from Ireland.

This i can belive,Have you ever been on a london building site with all the irish snakes digging holes lol just messing